This particular article is titled "Not nice guys, but cowards, finish last" by Robert Kiyosaki who is also the author of (I think) several books including Rich Dad, Poor Dad. Which I haven't read. Have you? Did you like it? Anyway......
The article talked about a recent study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, "Do Nice Guys -- and Gals -- Really Finish Last? The Joint Effects of Sex and Agreeableness on Income," by Timothy A. Judge of the University of Notre Dame, Beth A. Livingston of Cornell University and Charlice Hurst of the University of Western Ontario. The study talks about how they have found that men who are "nice" or more agreeable tend to make less many than their more aggressive counterparts. The article was a summation of four different studies that seemed to have found similar results.
In this particular article the author talked about what communication skills and also what defines a "nice guy". He also talks about a business experience of his from the 80's where communication and constructive criticism greatly influenced his life. Although he didn't finish the story about what happened to his wallet business, which I kind of found annoying. He did share some good thoughts though.
"The world is full of people who make excuses, people who are cowards and people who use the term "nice" to cover up their inability to make a hard decision, say what needs to be said or defend themselves, their position or other people because they're afraid of how they'll be viewed or that someone won't like them anymore.
This is cowardly.
In my experience, many people confuse being cowardly with being nice. It's easier to aim to please and say what others want to hear than to form an opinion and fight for it, even if it means taking a risk or losing your job."
The author seemed to focus on the ability to communicate relating to financial success. And this is what got me thinking. I'm a big fan of healthy communication skills. Most likely because I seriously lack them. I can express my opinion, both verbally and written. And possibly excessively. But expressing my feelings verbally is a real struggle for me, especially if I'm upset. I have a fester and rot style of communication. I can usually get my feelings across by writing them down, but how often do you have the chance to do that in life? So teaching my girls healthy communication skills starting at a young age is really important to me. We communicate a lot around here. Feelings are talked about and expanded upon. Whenever there have been hurt feelings we talk about it. When there is tattling (can you imagine?!) the expression of feelings is encouraged instead of whining. There are days when healthy communication starts as early as 5:30 and doesn't stop until the girls are in bed over 12 hours later. At which point, I do sometimes appreciate a lack of communication for just a few minutes.
Now, I've been thinking about this article quite a bit in the last week. Honestly, I don't know from personal experience if nice guys/gals finish last, first or middle. But I do think there is something to be said about communication skills effecting your life. I think that having good communication skills in a variety of situations can make for a more contented life because you're not festering and rotting over things that you should have said. Or maybe shouldn't have said when you finally, completely lost it.
So, tell me, do you think nice guys finish last? First? Not at all? Do you really think that good communication skills are essential to success, be it financial or not? And is the only measure of success financial gain? (I think not) And, most importantly, do you think my fester and rot style of "expression" is making me age faster than healthy communicators? I think that's a strong possibility....
**And today I learned that if you push control + p it will not, in fact, paste something. It will post your unfinished blog post. So don't do that. Ya learn something new everyday!