Names have been changed to protect the innocent...and my husband...and me...but not the dog. His name is Dexter.

Sunday, March 27, 2011

The Escape That Wasn't

Remember a few weeks back when I talked about Creative Estates?  Right here.  Remember?  I was so excited to go.  I don't get to do too much crafty stuff these days but I do love it.  And hearing all about Creative Estates and the fun things they had planned sent my cold, craft-less heart all a-flutter.  To say I was excited about going would be a slight understatement.  I was thrilled!  PLUS!  I would be traveling in style in the Party Car with Steph and Tauni.  It would be the perfect little escape for this overworked Mama.

And now? I can't go.  When I realized the date I started getting unsettled.  It's the weekend between Aid Appreciation Week and Teacher Appreciation Week which I am surprisingly in charge of.  The PTA was desperate.  But I thought I could make it work.  Get everything done ahead of time, go a little crazy the week of, but everything would be fine.  Then I looked at the soccer game schedule.  The first game is on April 9.  It will be Babs first game ever.  And that just is one of those moments that I can't get back.  How could I miss her first soccer game?!
I went back and forth trying to figure it out.  To make it work out.  Then I finally realized that I can't.  I can not make this all work.  Something has to give somewhere.  And at this point of my life, my "social life" (let's pretend that I have one) is what had to give.  We would all be upset about me missing the game.  And as much as I hate to say it, PTA played a factor in it too.  I don't think I can do it all and still keep family life normal AND go out of town.  Although it is possible that I'm being overly dramatic and reverting to my natural assumption of my own failures.  And that I'm more than a little nervous to be 12 hours away from my children for 5 days.  But I don't know.  

So I made my decision (kinda) and put on my big girl panties.  I sent the email to Tauni axing my crafty vacation.  And I really thought I was okay with it.  Until I hit "send" and started to cry.  I guess I'm not all that good at being a grown up after all. 

I keep telling myself it's just that time of life.  The small sacrifices I make now will have a big pay off for my children in the future.  And being home, spending time with my girls doesn't really feel like a sacrifice at all.  Missing out on Creative Estates feels like a sacrifice, that's for sure.  I really hope I made the right decision.  But soon my girls will be so grown up and won't need me anymore.  And then I can do all the things that I put off doing now.  They are so worth it. 
Until then, I will wear my big girl panties, even though they are bunching, and I will carry on.  Yes, I will be missing out on the most fabulous crafting conference to ever take place.  Maybe next year.  A time and season for everything.  And right's PTA and soccer season. 


Becky said...

Those choices are so hard to make but i am sure you did the right thing. It is hard to always put kids and family first when you are in need of time, but you could not have fun knowing all that you were missing.

Kristina P. said...

I think that while many of these social media relationships will be around for a long time, many of them will come and go. Your relationship with your daughters are forever. (I really should write for Hallmark.)

In other news, if you can, you can still hang with the Sassies that day!

Emily said...

I hate wearing big girl panties because they do bunch. Such a pain in the you-know-what. But your family is so worth it. You just scored major bonus points in heaven, trust me.

Happy Granny said...

You did make a good decision because as let down as you are to miss the conference, you would be even more disappointed and sad to be sitting in a conference hundreds of miles away, missing something that is so important to you. Your kids need you for everything now, but the day will come when they don't, and that will be a sad day, too. So enjoy every moment you can, and remember there will be other opportunities that will come at a good time, and you'll be able to enjoy them, too. You will not be sorry you made such a good choice.

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